Thank you Totally Unicorn for a shout out in their blog…
… and now on to my favourite band ever; Iron Maiden.
Here are ten reasons why Iron Maiden are the greatest heavy metal band of all time…
10. Classics. Loads of them! Aces High, Running Free, Run To The Hills, The Trooper, Be Quick or Be Dead, Fear Of The Dark, 2 Minutes to Midnight… shit, all of these are heavy metal fucking ANTHEMS!
9. Nicko McBrain’s face. That thing has been sanded flat to make way for more drums! Nicko disappeared behind his massive kit so many years ago Steve Harris has forgotten what he looks like.
8. Energy. They still fling themselves around stage like a bunch of kids, it’s amazing! While peers Slayer might look meaner and scarier, I’d fancy myself to atleast be able to beat those fat bastards in a foot race!*
7. Worldliness. Watch the excellent documentary Global Metal and you will see a universal love of Iron Maiden. Their shirts are everywhere in this film and the love from interviewees for Iron Maiden is palpable.
6. Artwork. Iron Maiden’s artwork is still as Iconic as it ever was, from their logos to their record covers, an Iron Maiden album stands out!
5. Laurels. They haven’t rested on them. On their most recent tour they drew heavily from their latest album The Final Frontier, and while it was the TFF tour a lot of their contemporaries would have still dialed in a greatest hits set. This is a band that still cares, and you know what? They KILLED it last tour!
4. Bruce Dickinson. I know he wasn’t the first singer but he is better than Paul Di’Anno and that other singer that dare not be named! His voice is as distinctive as Ozzy’s and stronger than Halford’s, the perfect voice for classic heavy metal and a signature of TNWOBHV.
3. Guitarmy. Janick Gers, Adrian Smith & Dave Murray create a prison-wall thick thump of gorgeous metal tones that fairly lift you from your seat (if you were unfathomably sitting down) at a Maiden show. Riffs for days my friends, riffs for days…
2. ED FORCE ONE. A jet plane. They have their own jet plane! Do I even need to elaborate on this point? Oh, plenty of performing artists have their own private jets I’m sure but Bruce Dickinson flies the damn thing. The cool points here are through the roof!
1. So you’ve got you’re own plane, all decked out with your logo and artwork. What else do you want? What was that? A MOTHERFUCKING ROBOT!? Who doesn’t want their own 12-foot cyborg version of Ed Hunter?
If you’re reading this chances are your band is not as good as Iron Maiden’s… get yourself a robot.
* Disclaimer: That was a joke and was not intended to cause any offense to any member of Slayer (especially Kerry King). Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!!!!